Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Night Ranger -- "Sister Christian"

I have to say, I love this song more than I love my own sister (not really true), but I have been looking at these lyrics for several minutes and I cannot for the life of me figure out what it's about. I mean, I know what it's about, but without the help of Dick Wikipedia, I would still be in the dark. These lyrics are totally opaque and bizarre, which is not always a bad thing, but come on, this is friggin' Night Ranger, for Jeff's sake. Let's take a look, shan't we?

Sister Christian / Oh the time has come / And you know that you're the only one / To say O.K.

I have no idea what the hell you are talking about, but I am intrigued by your plaintive keyboard intro. Please continue.

Where you going / What you looking for / You know those boys / Don't want to play no more with you / It's true

At this point, my best guess is that this is a song about a 7-year-old transvestite.

You're motoring / What's your price for flight / In finding Mister Right / You'll be alright tonight

According to the aforementioned Mr. Wikipedia, "The lyric, 'You're motoring. What's your price for flight? In finding Mr. Right?'" is the subject of much debate." I mean, I would say that it could be the subject of much consternation, or befuddlement, or utter apathy, or suicidal depression, but debate? Really? Are people sitting around debating the meaning of this lyric? Shouldn't they be too busy rocking out and such? I mean, the idea that this lyric is the subject of much debate is about as believable as the idea that a grown man would sit at his computer for the better part of an hour and try to parse the ... oh. I see what you did there. Damn you, Richard Q. Wikipedia!!!!!

Babe you know / You're growing up so fast / And mama's worrying / That you won't last / To say let's play

The first four lines of this verse kind of make sense if you don't consider any of the other lyrics that preceded or followed them. In reality, this is a song about a young girl (the sister of one of the band members!) who I guess is sexually maturing faster than said band member would like. Fine. Not a terrible idea for a song. Kind of touching, if done properly. But why the lyric "You know those boys don't want to play no more with you?" Why will she not last to say "Let's play?" What is all this with the playing? Wouldn't the boys want to play with her even more, because she will potentially have sex with them? Or is that supposed to mean that the boys are no longer playing, but trying to have sex with her? Doesn't she know this? When exactly is she supposed to say, "Let's play?" Is this like one of Erikson's stages of development or something? I'm kind of drunk right now.

Sister Christian / There's so much in life / Don't you give it up / Before your time is due / It's true / It's true yeah

This lyric is actually fine. Not Faulkner-esque or anything, but fine. Let me take this opportunity to say, "IT'S TRUUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEE, YEEEEEEAAAAAAH-EAH-EAH!!!" Did I mention that this song is awesome?

Motoring / What's your price for flight / You've got him in your sight / And driving thru the night

This is nonsense.

Please go back to the video for this (Is this the real video or just some weird MTV thing?) and marvel at the band's mullet-perms ... a rare and delicious combo. Then check out what happens at exactly the four-minute mark. Thank you all for coming!

14 comments:

  1. The secret you're missing is that the chorus lyrics are actually "motor inn! what's your price per night?"

    ReplyDelete
  2. Which would then make this a song about a 7-year-old transvestite who happens to manage a Motel 6?

    No wonder her mama's worrying. Hell, I am a little bit worried.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I saw an interview with the members of Night Ranger where they explained that "motoring" was what they call cruising around the streets in the part of the country where they're from (see this video, at about 2:00). The best line in that video, though, is where they say how someone thought the song was about a nun who sold drugs...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anyhow, it's awesome whether or not it's about a 7 year old tranny or a drug-peddling nun or a band member's sister who's a bit naughty or about a lost wierdo who's period is overdue.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yeah the song is really really beautiful

    ReplyDelete
  6. Well. This song always got my attention as a teenage girl growing up. Turns out the term motoring has to do with a physiological shift in the brain having to do with hormones and glands causing a "shift in gears" so to speak in a persons outlook or perception of the world. A paradyme shift so to speak. This is what the scientific community thinks anyway. I find it very interesting that it also had everything to do with the "Alice in Wonderland Syndrome?"

    ReplyDelete
  7. Going on over an hour myself, trying to get it, keep getting distracted by the undeniable urge to ROCK THE FUCK OUT!!! every 45 seconds or so... then I try to gather myself up and ponder the great mysteries only to be interrupted by the need to pound the shit out of some air drums like a madman, then breathe and repeat ... after all this its whatever, yes, his sister christy, growing up is amazing and .... uh oh here it comes again .... DOUBLE ARM PUMPS with POWER!!!! CAN NOT CONCENTRATE - damn near perfection... slow start big build up then slow again but builds a little more ... slow then a little bigger ... return to slow then FUCKIN BIG !!!!! best part is the guitar solo is also fully fucking legit, yet can't help but get buried by my man's mastery of that drum kit.


    Excellent website, I love this song and I am also very drunk as I type these closing words; however, you my unknown friend, have provided myself and these others an outlet to offer up our night ranger love and for me at least a good reason to listen to Sister Christian over and over again for probably more like an hour and a half

    1989 live - https://youtu.be/krG3TkSP0jE

    ReplyDelete
  8. Are you serious? These are some of the least oblique lyrics I have ever seen. It is a song where the singer laments that his sister is growing up too fast and is trying to warn her against sex.. Bam there, that is it, not hard to figure out at all.

    Sister Christian / Oh the time has come / And you know that you're the only one / To say O.K.
    This line is about consent, a reminder that she doesn't have to have sex if she doesn't want to

    You're motoring / What's your price for flight / In finding Mister Right / You'll be alright tonight
    motoring is driving of course, the "price for flight" line that seems to give people so much trouble is the singer asking his sister if she is really ready to give up her precious virginity. it is just a different phrasing for the colloquialism "Paying the price".

    Also this song fucking sucks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes this song does fucking suck...

      Delete
  9. HA ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha (inhale snort) ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha (gasp)... Too damn funny. All of it.

    ReplyDelete
  10. i heard its about smoking crack

    ReplyDelete
  11. I love the fact that this God awful piece of ear numbing shit is still getting comments on this useless blog in 2017. Original post here is awesome and should have broken the internet in July 2009.

    ReplyDelete